Honestly, I don’t have any for now. “Love your job and change your mind set for making it as your hobby” and it’s absolutely doesn’t work to me for now. It’s a blessing for being here, indeed. Getting this job is a part of GOD’s grace for me when I have to go away from my previous company in Jakarta, and I have to find another company in this new town, Medan to survive with my new life, new role and new responsibility. I’m amazed for all the things that I go through with GOD, including finding this job.
Before join to this company I know a lil bit about the company, the work and people in it. I think I have to struggle and don’t have any idea for disappointing my great GOD who has given this to me. I do have passion from the first day being here. I start to make a new plan and create my own dream in a new place I am. Properly, it’s a normal for spending time to adapt with a new environment, new responsibility, new knowledge. Day by day there always something that make me down, I feel I lose my passion in work. I don’t have any spirit as the first I work in here, and everything in my mind from the first time is gone.
I don’t know what happen and why this come over me. If there’s something out of my opinion, I feels too hard to fight with what I have to tell. I always feel that there’s a high battle between me and them, and it tells the distance and another word of it is we’re a different level, so don’t make any move. arghhhhh.. I’m totally dying of it. Day by day, the passion is gone and it makes me don’t give my best for what I did😥.
I don’t like me for now. I don’t want to see that battle anymore, I don’t want to be treated as what they want anymore. I know I can do it, I don’t want lose my spirit, my passion and my dream. GOD place me here for any reason, and I truly believe when GOD gave me this one, HE must be trust on me that I can struggle through.
There’s no a huge load, when we have strength, as long as I live the biggest strength I got is from my AWESOME GOD, CHRIST JESUS. Lord.. I don’t ask for letting me out from this, I ask for the strength you have, so I can go through.